Porn trooper update

Your name is Barbie. You drive a pink car. And not just any pink car but the most famous pink Honda in all of Tennessee.

It's probably not a great time for you to write about how you've had illegal narcotics in your car or how you like to knock the cocktails back at happy hour. Or is it?

Barbie Cummings, the porn star who gave a blow job to a state trooper during a traffic stop, is enjoying her 15 minutes of fame. She writes about life post trooper on her new (temporary) blog site. Soon, the frequent star of sites such as Black on Blonde, will get her own site at the domain name that used to be home to her blog, barbiecummings.com. Her producer, Billy Watson, has his own blog, I Shoot Porn, where he has made some interesting points about the whole episode.

As for the trooper, he was fired last week.

And as for the video clip of their encounter, it's popping up on the web. We found a couple sites that have posted it. The clip we saw was short but in it, the police scanner plays while Barbie shows off her talents.

As for every cop in Tennessee? We imagine they're keeping an eye out for a pink Honda.

Like a virgin, only different

Another news item from the we-really-got-to-lighten-up-and-take-a-joke department.

This time, it's actress Katie Holmes who is gearing up her legal team to go after a wannabee porn starlet named, not so coincidently, Katee Holmes (that's her above).

Holmes, the one not married to our favorite wacky Scientologist, is allegedly an 18-year-old fashion student who claims her virginity is still intact. Shane's World Studios plans to feature her in a porn-ocumentary entitled True Diary: I'm A Virgin.

We use the term allegedly because we don't think any self-respecting fashion student would wear such a ratty skirt.

According to AVN the movie will "follow Holmes' entry into the porn business, from her first girl/girl scenes to choosing the right male partner for her boy/girl debut. The movie begins shooting in two weeks for a projected fall 2007 release. "

The other Holmes, the one we'd actually pay to see in a porno as long as it didn't have anything to do with her husband or eating placentas, was so pissed she immediately decided to give virgin Katee a million dollars in free publicity.

Non-porn Katie isn't exactly a virgin when it comes to onscreen nudity. She took it off in The Gift, a movie we won't even pretend to have seen. Though, we will admit to having googled for the stills. Nice. We like. Here's the non-virgin Katie looking out from what we guess is her glass-enclosed cell, high atop the Scientology tower.

One way out of a ticket

Sometimes, we fantasize about being a cop. The uniform. The sidearm. The handcuffs. The blow jobs from porn stars.

We just hope we're as quick on our feet as Tennessee Tooper James Randy Moss, who pulled over Barbie Cummings (her real name is Justis Richert) in her pink Honda going 92 in a 70 mph zone.

We probably would have just asked for an autographed photo.

Of course, we're not highly trained police officers.

According to reports, Moss whipped out his nightstick and asked for a little more. Cummings, who lives in Tennessee but commutes to L.A. to shoot her pornos, was more than happy to oblige, especially considering she had some narcotics in her car and some alcohol in the back seat.

In exchange, Moss conveniently tossed the "happy pills," as Cummings describes them on her blog, into the bushes.

You could say trooper and porn star were just extending each other some professional courtesies.

Cummings' wrote about the incident in a May 7 entry on her blog. It was down when we tried to check it out today but thank goodness for Google's cache files.

He kept saying to me, and now I understand why, “are you sure you aren’t hiding anything on your persons?” He asked me that about ten times, and I just thought it was routine.

Well, now I understand what he wanted me to do. So, he asks me about what I do. I tell him internet and movies.

He asks me one of the sites, I tell him to go to my blog(this one). He then proceeds to open his lap top in his car.(I mind you, at this point I am sitting in the front seat of his car with him)

He brings up my blog and we watch two of my video clips. I don’t even know what to do at this point, I thought I was going to jail.

He says to me, while staring at the screen, “this is making me hard.”

Oh dear…

Now, I understand.

Below is a cropped version of a photo that Cummings posted on her site that Moss supposedly snapped during the traffic stop. Be sure to check out the interview with Cummings on the Knoxville News Sentinel's web site.